because I said so....

Sometimes I don’t know who is more rotten or difficult….Erik or Chelsea! I am sure he would kill me for saying that (but just between you and I) it’s right as rain. They are never just “happy,” there has to be something to bitch about. Yesterday, I made Erik breakfast in bed (which in my house meant going to the grocery, chopping & measuring ingredients, cleaning the dishes, beating the kids back from the stove)…..He responded unenthusiastically with ”this bacon is a little too crispy” And you know what, it was…..BUT, had the situation been reversed, I would NEVER have said that out loud. I would have eaten it anyway, or said I was stuffed…but criticism, that wouldn’t have happened. I wouldn’t have the nerve, after someone went out of their way, to brush it off like it was no big deal and critique their efforts. And Chelsea has made it her mission to fight with me three times a day about every single meal. I could tell her that for dinner we are having Taco Bell Cheese Quesadillas and Cheesecake for dessert…..and she would complain…..”You know I don’t like to eat Taco Bell on MONDAYS! UMPH! *stomp off into her room and slam shut her door* It is ridiculous. And, the worst part about it, is that the others are starting to follow suit as well.

The horrible thing about all the negativity is that it’s starting to ruin my mood…..and my outlook. This morning I woke up and just didn’t even want to bother getting dressed. I don’t even want to be a part of it. I’ve just had all the wind sucked out of me, you know? I don’t have the energy or the patience to cater to everyone, and I am tired of being optimistic and expecting anything to change, you know?

erik, chelsea, happy

What have you done for ME lately?

Oh my goodness, I haven’t typed in this journal for a long long time! Almost a year. That’s really sad because that means that there is a year of memories missing. Actually, not quite a year. I think I have added an entry or two to my online journal, I will just have to paste them over.

Here is an e-mail I received this morning from my husband:

Good morning my love!

You said that you like having e-mails waiting on you in the morning, so I thought I'd drop you a little note to tell you how beautiful you are!!

Thanks for putting up with me.

Love,
Me

Yesterday our electricity got shut off and he had a panic attack. I borrowed 236.19 from Mom (to be paid back on Friday) and it’s all back to normal now, no one even knows any different. But he takes things like that very personally. It messes with his pride. I don’t think of situations like those as “big deals.” When the problem is clearly identified, and we know specifically how to fix it. That’s no reason to panic. Now if the electricity was off, we didn’t know why, had no idea who to call, or how much it was going to end up costing….that would make me nervous. But Indianapolis Power and Light? I knew what they wanted and how to reach them—no problem there. I just made a couple of calls and, “Vióla, problem solved.” All of that being said, I DO need to make a budget. Erik takes all of this on himself and it’s not fair. We need to be working together. He takes all of this pressure onto himself because, by not stepping up and assuming responsibility for things, I am leaving him with the impression that I expect him to take care of it. Which isn’t true of course, I don’t expect him to “take care of it,” just to let me know what he needs….which is, to him, equal to walking around the neighborhood in a woman’s brassiere and thong unfortunately.

Ryan is taking electric guitar lessons. He has had 3 lessons so far. He’s going to a guy named Phil Pierle at “All About Music” (or something like that) on the corner of Emerson and Thompson. It’s kind of pricy…it runs about $18/per lesson. He is having his 30 minute lessons on Tuesday evenings at 7:30 p.m. He got an electric guitar for Christmas (a black Fender) and has been begging for lessons ever since, and, I have to say, he seems like a natural to me.
I have been to as many lessons as him of course (being his driver and all) but I just don’t get it. Phil just has to say “G” or “F” and Ryan is strumming like he knows exactly what he’s asking for. He doesn’t even have to say it any more, he just points to the paper and Ryan READS what to do. It’s insane. He knows that this note on this line means you have to put these fingers here and strum across these specific strings. CRAZY. He’s even learning how long it says to hold that note. Although he tends to rush through the counting though. I’ve listened to everything his teacher has said and it doesn’t make any sense to me. It’s almost like my brain just rejects that information. It’s like trying to walk through a closed door. I am right with you……and then…….BOOM. Closed door. I no longer have any idea what you are saying.

I should probably comment here on Easter this year. It was on Sunday, April 12th this year (2009). It was really sketchy for a minute. Grandma Cook fell and scratched herself up really bad a month or 6 weeks before so she wasn’t quite sure if she could host Easter this year, which left all of us in a panic thinking about what back up plans we should have in place for the inevitable day when she isn’t well enough to host it (she is in her 80’s now). But she is ok now.

I went overboard on the baskets AGAIN this year. Picking up little stuff here and there since Valentine’s Day, and then, I go to put it all together, and it’s chaos. Movies, candy, yo-yo’s, bubbles, paper grass (because plastic grass is the spoils of lucipher), balls, magnifying glasses, gift cards—and yet I still feel guilty for not getting kites, sunglasses, and sidewalk chalk. Isn’t that funny? I wonder if we had a lot of stuff in our Easter baskets when we were little. I bet everything was more expensive and harder to find!

Snow Day

Today, in light of being stuck at home due to horrendous snow....my husband, Erik, and I are making a list of the top 50 things we plan to do to our children when they become adults....

1. Hide all of the spoons and cups in their house.
2. Download tons of programs full of viruses on their pc's and change their homepage.
3. Color and write gibberish on their walls.
4. Put ink fingerprints all over their toilet seats (courtesy of Bekah).
5. Eat all their ice cream and drink all their pop.
6. Cry loudly til they go to burger king...then not eat anything and complain/break
the toy.
7. Break all Christmas gifts before New Year's Day.
8. Get their mail, and not give it to them.
9. Leave toys, chips and cereal all over their floor.
10. Spread hamster food all over their bedroom, and then, after they clean it up, do it immediately again.
11. Throw a fit until they allow us to wear clothes that do not fit (or match) out in public and to family gatherings.
12. Steal money out of every hiding place and spend it at the crane machines in the grocery stores.
13. Rent porn.
14. Say profanity randomly in front of people they respect and admire, just to see their reactions.
15. Walk around the house in only our underwear.
16. Always wear our shoes on the wrong feet (courtesy of Olivia).
17. Cut all of the collars off of Chelsea's clothes and steal her bras and underwear.
18. Leave Chelsea's shoes and socks in a pile under her computer desk.
19. Drop our coats and bags in the foyer, blocking the front door.
20. Break their doorbell, and when they replace it, break it again.
21. Break all the glass in their picture frames.
22. Change clothes 20 times a day so they can never catch up with their laundry.
23. Ask them to change the channel on the tv every 10 minutes, and come into their room to update them on what each character says.
24. Stand in front of the t.v.
25. Jump on their beds.
26. Play with feet...all the time....everywhere, even at church.
27. Spraypaint Chelsea's bedroom wall.
28. Scream and slam doors.
29. Throw things at them....all the time.
30. Break all of their window screens.
31. Lick the inside of their car windows and draw pictures in the spit.
32. Suck on candy and gum, and stick it in the carpet (both in the house and in the car)
33. Hide cups and food under the seats of the car and not tell them for months.
34. Steal 4 of their favorite blankets and, along with a dozen or so stuffed animals, make them bring them everywhere we go.
35. When the take us out to an expensive dinner, eat nothing but the condiments (catsup and butter).
36. Hide all of their phones until the batteries die.
37. Steal their cameras and load it up with pictures of ourselves doing gang signs (for our myspace page, of course).
38. Demand a hug and kiss whenever they leave the house...even if it means chasing their car down the street in our underwear.
39. Break all their chairs and lawn furniture.
40. Pull their cushions off of their couches in a big pile in the living room, and then, after they put them back.....do it again.
41. Spill blue gatorade on their carpet.
42. Mess with their theromstats.
43. Break their toilets so they run all the time-and only use their private bathroom in the bedroom, not the one for company.
44. Pee in their beds.
45. Call them fat and that them we hate them.
46. Start screaming randomly whenever they answer the telephone.
47. Insist that we talk to whoever calls, whether we know them or not.
48. Stand in front of them and beg whenever they get a plate food, even if we have the same plate of said food.
49. Call them over and over and over again on their cell phones whenever they go out....or at work.
50. Cry and scream outside of their bedroom doors whenever they try to have sex.
51. Scratch all their favorite dvd's
52. Never go to bed....EVER! Until they threaten lives...well, a couple of hours after that....
53. Cut our own hair.
54. Insist on watching movies that do not exist.
55. Make up different names for songs and movies we enjoy, and do not tell anyone the "secret code" Just keep asking, screaming, and crying repeatedly until they guess the right thng.
56. Change the names for all the icon's on their pc's.

dinosaurs

Last night, after we put the kids to bed, Erik told me the funniest story!

We had stopped at Methodist hospital yesterday morning to pick up some x-rays before an appointment with Erik’s back surgeon. I ran in to get the c.d. of M.R.I.s while Erik stayed outside with the kids in the van.
I guess that Olivia was drawing in a notebook. Waiting impatiently Erik hears behind his seat, “Daddy, do dinosaurs have wee-wee’s?” And Erik, without much thought said, “Yeah, Livy….I guess some of them probably did.” And she took that information and said, “O.K., I’m going to draw one on mine then!” Then, the reality of her question hit him and Erik quickly responded with, “NO, Don’t draw a wee-wee on your dinosaur!” The next question was, of course, “O.K. Dad, did dinosaurs wear underwears?” Now, out of concern for the integrity of Olivia’s drawing he confidently said, “Yes, Olivia, they all wore underwear.”

Cindy's Tips and Suggestions for the Drive-In

Hey y'all

Went to the Tibbs drive in on Saturday night. It was a wonderful night for it!

We saw Wall-e, and then, after the kids fell asleep, we watched Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull...good flicks. Wall-e was a great movie, very cute, but for less than 4 years of age it is a little hard to keep their attention I think. Unlike most Pixar/Disney movies with the double entandres to entertain both children and adults, this film has very little language and uses the expressive Wall-e to get its point across. My 12 year old wasn’t real impressed either. Might be best to wait for video. Indiana Jones was great, of course. There weren’t as many chase
scenes it seemed. I don’t know. When the first one came out I was at the edge of my seat of course, but now, 20 something years later….after Bourne Identity, Speed, and Di Vinci Code I think that my appetite for adrenaline has skyrocketed. It wasn’t a waste of money… but perhaps it would be best to wait until it comes out on video and sit down with the whole crew on family night for an Indy Jones Marathon, you know?

Here are some tips though, for the next family that goes to the drive-in. Its great All-American fun and I think that everyone should do it at least annually and take lots of pictures, so that they too can talk to THEIR kids about it someday. You know, about what us pioneers used to do for fun when we were little.

First of all, this we knew, they only take cash....so don't pull up with your credit or debit card and expect to get in.

Then, Don't park in the front. I know, you would think that would be the best spot....but when you make SEVEN potty breaks, you want to be in the back, cause it's closest to the concession stand where the restrooms are. I thought bringing a potty chair would be sufficient, but, according to my husband, we aren't "trash" and can use the bathroom like everyone else. After about the 5th trip I was very irritable and fully content to be trash.....apparently that's no longer an option 

Next....bring balls, Frisbee, bubbles, airplanes....anything to keep them company for the hour or so before the movie starts. We know this, but it slipped our mind. Which was fine, there were a lots of nice kids that were willing to share....just FYI.

Also....don't just assume that your kids are behaving nicely in the van because it's all quiet in there. They COULD be moving the ignition switch from AUX to ON (without your knowledge, damn those Odysseys with their quiet engines!) thus
draining your entire battery---but rest assured Tibbs drive in has battery jumpers for just such an occasion. You have to bring your license to the concession stand as a deposit and they will "loan" it out for you to jump your car, then, of course, you return it for your license when you are done. It just takes a minute. But go before the movie is over, because they only have 2 and they get loaned out quite a bit. AND, here’s an interesting fact, even when your car won't start you can still listen to the radio through the speakers on the AUX position :) ALSO, good idea to bring an extra trash bag and flashlight for picking up trash after the movie is over.

Finally...If you bring Shredded Italian Beef, that you have been cooking in the crock pot all day, make sure you package it securely so that the delicious, albeit greasy, juice doesn't soak through the insulated carrier, thus soaking a now useless comforter. Also, you'd be surprised at how great a selection they have at the concession stand. We have gotten pizzas there in the past--YUMMY! We always bring popcorn and go to the Dollar Tree for cheap movie snacks...and we pack a cooler with Capri Suns for the kids to save $, but if you have $ the concession stand is a fine option.

ALSO, there is a Mug N Bun down the road (that also only takes cash) that is yummy of course....I just can't pass a breaded tenderloin!

Hope you all have a great summer!

RECIPE FOR SLOW COOKED ITALIAN BEEF
1 can of beef broth 1 jar of peppercini’s (with the juice)
1 large rump roast

Put in the crock pot on HIGH for 6-8 hours. Shred and then put on low to keep warm until needed. Great with spicy mustard and provolone or pepperjack cheese 

birdilies

E-mail from mom:

Livie's question, "Do birds come when you're asleep?"

love

mom

olivia, birds

church

We went to church at St. Jude today. It was cute. Olivia was watching the priest up from prepare the communion. Breaking the bread, pouring the wine. She looked at me with her eyes all big, “I’m gonna eat THAT!” You can imagine how devestated she was when she got in line (for what she thought was “snack time”), crossed her arms, went to the front of the church, and THEN, instead of giving her a cracker and drink, he had the NERVE to BLESS her. She instantly fell into a gooey pile of snot and tears, right there in front of the whole congregation.

And, if that didn’t draw enough attention….her, Ryan, and Bekah cried even louder when we went to leave and I wouldn’t give them change to throw into the Holy Water font and make a wish! I think we need to start bringing them to church more often, and feed them breakfast first!

church, olivia